here we are again all by ourselves

Its time for day 3 of the 30 day movie challenge! w00t! Today's topic is a bit more straightforward than the first two, but equally awesome nonetheless.

DAY 3: LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN THEATRES

"True Grit", 2010.

This is also the first movie I've chosen thats come out in the last two decades, I've noticed. One cold Sunday night me and my boys, Joey and Dave, were sitting around in my cozy blue apartment bored as snails, when I decided to hound them with the idea of seeing a movie. Hounding wasn't needed. Dave and I had wanted to see this for awhile, and Joey was totally down. Fortunately, all three of us adored it. How could we not? The Coen Brothers are among the best directors, well, ever in my opinion. They have such a diverse catalogue of films ("Fargo", "The Big Lebowski", "Burn after Reading"). They have something for everybody. True Grit was no exception to their genius. Its based on a novel, and is the story of a young girl back in the day who vows revenge on the man who murdered her father. Its a western, lots of horses and gunfights. The acting is brilliant; Jeff Bridges is an absolute god, and the little girl who played Mattie was amazing - she was actually 14 when she starred in the movie, the same age as her character. I was really sad she didn't get the best supporting actress oscar. Its an epic movie with lots of great acting, action, and the story is oh so wonderfully told.

And now, continuing on.

Today I am planning on spending my whole day in the library studying biology. I am there now, munching on McBreakfast, and thought I'd treat myself to some leisurely blogging love firsthand. I am terrified for finals! Argh! I just want to skip them. Between that and my financial worries I pretty much want to bury my head in the ground like an ostrich. But as always, good times will come - just gotta keep a positive attitude. It makes all the difference.

I painted a picture last night, inspired by Sarah and Lenore's GROW prompt for the month of April. Their first prompt was to grow a picture from a quarter-sized circle in the centre of the page. My circle was a bit off centre, but I painted a watercolor picture of an orange cross-section. I was pretty impressed with it. So lucky I have so many artistic, inspiring friends. Yay.


Now its off to nerdland, to fill my brain up to the brim with confusing Latin words and fishparts.

XO

the way we get by.

Hello, friends. This weekend has been more hectic than expected. Despite my reservations about having a social weekend, I ended up being on the ball and spent less than 24 hours in my house since Friday morning. Quel surprise. It wasn't a waste, at least I got lots of Joeylove in, and lots of time in general with my sweet Mullock honeys. I love how no matter what they always want me around, and they make me feel like such a vital presence. They certainly are. I absolutely adore you guys.

Tonight Sarah came up for a coffee, chatsy singalong and I loved every moment of it. I hate that its so late in the semester and everyone is busy and I can't spend more times with my favorites. Sarah, darling, I ache for you everyday. You're like an instant gift certoficate to fun and happy times. I cannot wait to clay cafe with you soon and beach with you like everyday this summer. You inspire me so. I wish you happy paperings.

Now its time for day 2 of the 30 day movie challege! yay!

DAY 2: FAVORITE ANIMATED FILM

"The Secret of NIMH", 1982.

This question is equally difficult as the first. There are so many tremendous animated films in the world, its so hard to pick just one. I picked The Secret of NIMH because it was my favorite movie as a child; I even named my first pet, a little mouse, after the momma mouse in the movie, Mrs. Brisby. If I could watch this movie everyday, I probably would. It makes me feel such joy. Its pretty intelligent and sad for a children's movie, as well, and the animation is fantastic, particularly the super scary intense scenes where they're experimenting on the laboratory rats. Essentially, its about a field mouse who has to move her dying son safely before "moving day" (when the farmer plows the field all the little critters live in), and to do this she gets the help of the "rats of NIMH", who live in a rosebush near the farmhouse. They are all escaped laboratory rats, who have human levels of intelligence because of the experiments done on them. It has so many sad and hilarious moments. Definitely the animated movie I hold dearest to my heart.

Thats all for today. Lenore - you are in my thoughts, and I love you madly, and miss you like crazy <3 Stay strong, honeybee.

Goodnight, friends and darlings.


XO

30 days of film.

I decided to do something fun with my blog! A bunch of people on facebook have been doing something called the "30 day movie challenge", which looked incredibly fun, so I decided to do it here in blog form! Its similar to the 30 days of lists challenge everyone has been doing around blogland. Basically, you get a category of sort's each day and you have to pick your favorite, or sometimes least favorite, from said category. I adore movies, always have. Theres nothing like an amazing movie to take you out of the world and put you in somebody else's place for awhile, whether it be for good or bad. I love movies that make me imagine. I love movies that make me cry (which is very hard to do, you'd laugh at some of the movies I've cried at, though). So here I begin! With day 1!


DAY 1: FAVORITE MOVIE

"American Beauty", 1999.

I really wish this question was last, just because this is the hardest one to answer I feel. Its so hard for me to narrow down a movie I'd consider my "favorite". But the one that always springs to mind immediately when asked this question is probably American Beauty. I've seen it too many times to count. The acting is superb, particularly Kevin Spacey and Annette Benning. Their hilarious chemistry as Lester and Carolyn is perfect. I love all the different questions the movie brings up about the nature of beauty and appearances, sexuality, and suburban life. Also, the script was written by Alan Ball, the mastermind behind "Six Feet Under" and "True Blood". Its perfect in almost every way. And every time Elliott Smith's cover of "Because" by the Beatles starts playing as the credits role my heart breaks a little bit. If you've never seen this movie, please do. I beg of you.


Thats all for today honeys! Now I'm off to fiercely stick my pretty nose into some hardcore biological study, hooooorray~


XO

all along the watchtower.

hey, boys & girls.

I apologize for not posting in yeons, but what can you do! My wonderous Sarah lappie has more or less died an unpleasant death, or should I say is pretty badly crippled as of right now - its in denial that it has a hard drive. hopefully my darlingboy can do something about it and make it live again, but I don't really have my fingers crossed too tightly. I have the worst luck.

Today I had my biology lab final, and I was pretty saddened by it. I'm going miss giggling over dead rats and frogs and grasshoppers with my labmates, they were a delight this semester. It was the best of times. Hopefully someday in my studies I'll get to take another laboratory course, I really enjoy the hands on aspect of it. And, well, I just plain like looking inside stuff, I know thats kinda creepy and gross, but its so interesting seeing how everything works! The body is such a brittle, delicate thing when you get down to it. Frightens meee.

The last few weekends have been far too much fun, lots of drunken chats and love and being silly with the gang. A lot of it is pretty fuzzy, honestly, but I remember coming out of the blurriness with a big ol' smile on my face and thats good enough for me.

I don't really have too much to say right now (as you might've been able to discern from my inability to speak proper English and my vagueness towards all manners of life), so I shall stop here for now. Just wanted to let everyone know that I am still very much alive, and very much well. I can only hope that when I crawl from the dark, dank abyss that is threatening to consume my life for the next four or so weeks that I shall feel the sunshine on my face. Damn you, school. Damn you winter.

But the rest of you get my love.


XO

vanilla dome.

I made the mistake, as I do everytime I have anything important to do (i. e. schoolwork/studying), of finding something so impossibly entertaining that I can't do much aside from be distracted. Yup, I downloaded an SNES emulator and have been immersing myself in various Final Fantasy Titles, Zelda: A Link to the Past, and Super Mario World for more or less the entire weekend. My entire Saturday was spent in my bed listening to David Suzuki podcasts (which, in my defense, were actually for a class, sorta) and cycling through my newfound game collection. Its been both too nostalgic and exciting to put into words.

David Suzuki. What a guy. I'm convinced Mother Nature won't let him die until he saves the planet, dude is super old (though in incredible shape for being 74). I think he's definitely one of the most amazing people alive right now. The podcasts I'm listening to are called "The Bottom Line", which is a series he did that was aired on CBC Radio One in early 2010 or something I think? Its basically about how lifestyle is affecting the environment. He travels around to different places interviewing people about different topics like climate change, agriculture, oil, etc. Its a great series, well worth a listen, and I think you can stream it off the CBC website for free. Conservation biology and environmentalism are love.

Its time for English now though, unfortunately. How was everybody's weekend?

XO

the origin of love

Last night me and my lovely friend Allan went for dinner and a show. We headed downtown for delicious food at Jungle Jim's (and multiple delicious cocktails that tasted like yummy tropical juice), and then headed to the Rock House for HEDWIG & THE ANGRY INCH. This was a really special night; Allan and I have been in love with the movie almost since we first became friends. I didn't know what to expect at all, really; I knew the play would obviously be very different from the movie.

It was incredible; the actor who played Hedwig was perfect. He looked the part entirely, and he was such a diva. I'd imagine its an incredibly difficult part to play; basically putting off a concert while in character, as a female, and he didn't break character once. He was sexy, hilarious, perfect really. It was essentially a one-man show, just Hedwig and her band, the Angry Inch. They even added a bunch of jokes about St. John's into the opening of it; it was basically supposed to be a concert, with Hedwig telling her story. The music was sensational, the acting was astonishing, and I loved how interactive it was.

If you've never seen the movie, I'd get on that. If you like musicals, its definitely a treat. A very sad story, sassy, hilarious. So many things. Hedwig had a sex change operation performed so as to able to leave communist East Germany and get married (a marriage which collapses rather quickly), but the operation was botched, leaving Hedwig with a mound of flesh that leaves her neither male nor female (her "angry inch"). Its a story about finding love and finding yourself. Super smart and funny. And the music is so goddamn catchy. 

My favorite part of the movie, and one of my favorite songs, is when Hedwig is telling a story that his mother told him, which is actually Aristophanes' speech from Plato's Symposium. Its about how humans used to be beings with 2 faces, 4 arms, 4 legs, and how the Gods were angered with them and cut them in half. Now we spend our lives trying to find our other half, and sex is how we try to put ourselves back together again. Its a beautiful story, both the song and its original philosophical manifestation.

Thats enough gushing for now (I could write a lot more, trust me). Now I'm going to go listen to music and read about the Athabasca oil sands (for academic reasons). I hope everyone is having an amazing weekend.


XO

are you human?

Another lovely weekend spent with my lovely friends. Friday we hit up Mullock House for exactly what I wanted after my hellishly stressful week - a sloppy, silly night full of awesome music, dancing, hugs and delicious food. I passed out in my friend Daniel's bed like a happy, drunken baby and woke up to a day of pretending it was summer with 10am outdoor beers and wandering around parks with two of my favorite boys.

I followed that up with two days of lazing around with one of other favorite boys reading and studying. Tonight the boyfriend & myself left the cozy confines of our underground lovenest for bookshopping and delicious food.

At the end of this weekend - which turned out to be lovely, stressfree, productive, and comfortable as anything - I could really not be happier. Its time like this that remind me how lucky I am to have the life I do, and to have the people in it that make it so very sunny. Thanks, friends & lovers <3

I decided to take the summer semester at MUN, as well. Its either go to school or have a shitty job, and at least taking classes I won't have my soul hollowed out by a minimum wage job. In the meantime, I get to stress about this semester and try not to think about my Centre for Nursing Studies application, which I am hoping is in loving, considerate hands.

I am in the process of writing a short story now, an odd thing for me. I don't usually write, well, anything. I am also working on another mysterious short piece (SARAH) which I'm hoping will reach completion by tomorrow at the very latest. I am way past my deadline.

That is all for tonight. I am off to sprawl out on my couch like a comfy, happy cat and finish reading "The Divine Ryans" by Wayne Johnston, which so far is actually really enjoyable.

XO

i was the lead in the orphan choir.

I cannot stop listening to Massive Attack's latest album, Heligoland. My dear Sarah introduced me to the beautiful track "Paraside Circus" and ever since I've been all over the awesomeness of it; I love the variety of different, rich, beautiful vocals they used. Its very different from Mezzanine, I feel, but still oh so lovely. 

I am at school today, trying to study before rehearsal times for my cousin Patrick's short piece (he's doing a directing course, and I have volunteered my services). Studying is so hard, I can never force myself to concentrate long enough, or I get super distracted by random things like hilarious websites or Facebook. One of the best parts of not having internet at my house, usually, is the fact that I can avoid this, but I usually get distracted by other things like TV shows and books I've watched/read a thousand times and still can't get enough of. 

I'm not sure how I feel this week. Weird, for surely. Its been a wonderful midterm break, though thoroughly unproductive. I scarcely opened a book or glanced at a page of notes the whole five days I was off, and I feel like a huge loser because of it. School unnerves me to a crazy extent, and yet I do nothing to fix things for myself. Its stupid. I have another midterm coming up in a week and I have the bejesus scared out of me, frankly. I also have an essay due in a week and an assignment next week and a zillion other things I will probably continue to procrastinate on. Thats just what I do, really. 

I don't know what else to say, really. Had my last midterm (from the official first round of midterms) today and boy was it a breeze. I was terrified, but 40/75 multiple choice is the greatest thing ever to find on a test, and my prof's multiple choice are always easy, considering its a 2000 level science course. Most profs like to give you five answers that sound identical, but not this guy, thank god.

I can't think of anything else to say. I want to find a copy of "Collapse" by Jared Diamond this week, a popular science writer I love; its about how civilizations and what determines whether they will succeed or fail and what will be the probable fate of our current civilization. Sounds exciting.




XO

 

there are no words for what i'm feeling.

I had a pretty terrible Valentine's day, all things considered. I spent most of the day at school by myself, or curled up on my couch with my head poked into a psychology book trying not to run out of my house screaming. Its a long story, and mostly has to do with me being indecisive and insecure. Another time.

Then I got a phone call that turned my mood around entirely. It turns out my older sister, Sabrina, is pregnant! Not only that, shes also engaged! I am pretty much bursting at the seams with joy. This is both the first wedding and the first birth to occur amongst my immediate family, and to receive news of both within 24 hours is almost too much for me. Her fiancee is so sweet and kindhearted, I know he's going to take the best care of her ever and be such a good dad, and shes gonna be a wonderful mom.

My family has endured so many hardships over the years, so I sort of feel like our luck has finally turned, at least for now. New additions to our family, new life, new people to love. If I believed in God, I'd say he'd finally decided we'd had enough and decided to throw as much happiness as possible at us within the last year. My parents and siblings are healthy and happy, and now we get to spread so much of that happiness around. I can't wait for their wedding, and I can't wait to hold my new niece or nephew in my arms and speak French to them and buy them Dr. Seuss books and watch them grow up.

Life is fucking beautiful.


XO

somebody to love.

I cannot sleep because The Strombo Show, my preferred Sunday night sleepytimes radio program, is playing a barrage of '80s music that makes me both nauseous and a bit uncomfortable. Though I have to admit, I die for Pat Benatar's "Love is a Battlefield" and "Love Will Tear Us Apart" by Joy Division. But who doesn't? The rest all sounds like stuff I could hear on K-Rock at any point of the day or night. I think Georgie is having a midlife crisis. Poor Georgie!

In my lack of sleepies I should probably really be studying, but after watching two Psychology lectures, reading three chapters, and reading over two sections of slides for my Modern Biology & Human Society class this evening can't really say I'm too motivated to. I have a quota for how much of my limited attention span can be focused on academics each day, it would seem. Which isn't very long. I wish I could focus more on important things and less on stuff like novels I've already read and Zelda, but what can you do. Thats me and everybody, I guess.

I had a pretty good weekend. Friday the friends and myself headed out to my friend Lora's dad's lovely home in Flat Rock, which is a pretty little town outside St. John's. Most beautiful house in the entire world, it even has a three story greenhouse with all sorts of pretty plants and a loft and the entire house is filled to the brim with sunlight in the morning, its amazingly beautiful. Also, I want to kidnap her pets, they are so lovely. I got painfully drunk and we all ran around like sillies and the next morning hung out in plaid pajamas and ate Pizzaronis and taquitos for breakfast, and looked positively stately, as good friends do the morning after a bash.

Yesterday I ate at the Sprout with my sweetheart and wandered around downtown, spent the rest of my evening chez Empire where Amki and I drooled over gorgeous men in romantic comedies and wished we could whisk ourselves away to Italy for the rest of the winter. If only, the cold here is really starting to get to me. I miss grass, and sunshine. I miss colors and warmth and long days.

Today I woke up so contrary that I had to immediately crawl back into bed and sleep for another five hours or so, in some hope of feeling like a normal human being again. I don't know what's up, I felt like a tired little pile of poop all day. Very angry poop, very sad poop. The idea of being awake and doing anything, even drinking a cup of coffee, made me want to burst into tears. 

Winter does fucked up things to my brain.

XO

pumpkins & apples

Today I had my first Biology laboratory midterm of the semester, and what a good time that was, no sarcasm intended. It was super easy and after I got over the initial shaky nervousness that caused me to fuck up two garlic root tip slides and drench my hands in brown stain I was good to go. The hour passed fairly quickly, and I even got to spend a bit of time with my dear parameciums again. They're little protists that look like slippers and they are cute in a way that only something microscopic can be.

Seeee? Okay, maybe you don't. But they sort of move like aquatic caterpillars and I think its darling. I got to feed them yeast one day and I can't remember the last time I was excited about anything.

So, today I discovered that my great-aunt Hazel is getting a ferry named after her. Why? For being the first post-confederation female MHA in Newfoundland & Labrador. As you can imagine, my family is pretty excited and very proud of her. Shes extremely sick and will never really understand that shes earned this, but I imagine she'd be very happy with the honor if she were well. Everyone in the family is extremely ecstatic on her behalf, at least. I actually never knew she was the first female MHA until today; I knew that she was the mayor of St. George's, where my mom and her family grew up. Very cool. She's a wonderful person.

http://www.thetelegram.com/News/Local/2011-02-08/article-2208462/New-ferries-named-after-political-trailblazers/1

Thats all for today, however. Lots of excitement and good vibes floating around. I'm baking an apple pumpkin pie with homemade crust, and my oven is right behind me and I am pretty much ready to tear it out of the pan and eat the entire thing despite the obvious risks to my health and safety. I suppose I must learn some restraint.

The snow is howling, and I bid thee goodnight.

XO

coin operated.

My weekend passed in a haze of various indulgences, which I was extremely greatly for. I spent my entire weekend drinking & eating & smoking. I didn't open a book, and I spent almost two days away from home which was nice. Not out of town or anything, just at a friend's house on the opposite end of town. In a cat-like state of laziness the entire time, not wanting to wander home in the cold dampness. The narrow street made me feel safe, wrapped up in the whiteness of everything. Sometimes I really need to forget everything in my life and just go off and do whatever I want, and forget about obligations and responsibilities. My entire life is an extremely happy one, but sometimes I need to forget I'm a student, that I have a boyfriend, that I have a house to clean and books to read and friends to stress about and everything else. All of these things make me happy but sometimes I get this weird desire that none of its what I want; but by the time I'm ready to slip back into my day-to-day life I feel so full of want for it it almost pains me. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone, or sounds childish, or trashy. I swear its not.

This morning I had to do a reading for my English class. I was stressing about it for ages. We pretty much just had to pick a passage from any book or short story or whatever and read it in front of our class, as part of our participation mark. I chose the beginning of “White Oleander” by Janet Fitch. It wasn't my first choice, but the other books I was considering are on loan to various companions currently (“The Virgin Suicides” by Jeffrey Eugenides & “Lolita” by Vladimir Nabokov.) Or were too sexually depraved to read to a second-level university English class, I feel (“Beautiful Losers” by Leonard Cohen”). I was so nervous my legs were shaking and my voice sort of just rattled around in my throat hoarsely, so I did pretty terribly. I wanted to read it as beautifully as it was written, maybe even make somebody want to read it, but I probably just made people want to pat me on the head sympathetically. At least its done with.

What else is new and exciting in my life? Not much, really. My darling friend Lenore left awhile ago and left a sort of hole in my life that I can only fill with hours of playing the copy of “The Windwaker” she left me on the Gamecube she also left me, and reading good books and admiring her art on my walls.

I haven't been doing much of anything of late, really. I am cold all the time and sad and furious and impatient but I think a lot of that has to do with winter, it usually happens to me every winter. I try to overlook it but I feel like it takes up so much of me that all thats left when I push it aside is cogs and gears. I don't really know what I'm getting at, ever.

This blog still lacks direction, but so do I, so maybe thats fitting. Its just a jumble of words, like I am a jumble of cells. I hope someday it has a more decisive direction, for your sake, whoever you are.

I hope you have a splendid day.

XO