there are no words for what i'm feeling.

I had a pretty terrible Valentine's day, all things considered. I spent most of the day at school by myself, or curled up on my couch with my head poked into a psychology book trying not to run out of my house screaming. Its a long story, and mostly has to do with me being indecisive and insecure. Another time.

Then I got a phone call that turned my mood around entirely. It turns out my older sister, Sabrina, is pregnant! Not only that, shes also engaged! I am pretty much bursting at the seams with joy. This is both the first wedding and the first birth to occur amongst my immediate family, and to receive news of both within 24 hours is almost too much for me. Her fiancee is so sweet and kindhearted, I know he's going to take the best care of her ever and be such a good dad, and shes gonna be a wonderful mom.

My family has endured so many hardships over the years, so I sort of feel like our luck has finally turned, at least for now. New additions to our family, new life, new people to love. If I believed in God, I'd say he'd finally decided we'd had enough and decided to throw as much happiness as possible at us within the last year. My parents and siblings are healthy and happy, and now we get to spread so much of that happiness around. I can't wait for their wedding, and I can't wait to hold my new niece or nephew in my arms and speak French to them and buy them Dr. Seuss books and watch them grow up.

Life is fucking beautiful.


XO