all families are psychotic

I've been doing a lot of thinking about families lately. Watching "The Royal Tenenbaums" for the 1000th time (such a lovely film) and reading Douglas Coupland will do that to you, I guess. Also, I find when people outside my intimate circle ask me questions about my family I don't really know how to respond. All my best friends know all the juicy details about my family already and think they're a laugh, but these are understanding people I've known for years. I don't want to sugarcoat my family's craziness, but nor do I want to launch into detailed explanations. Its a tough call.

But maybe everybody sugarcoats their family when they talk about them. My sister's upcoming baby and our family tree branching off has made me think a lot about this lately - what the hell is that boy going to think of us? Who is he going to be within the grand crooked circle of Skinners? Is he going to inherit anything scary from us, either mentally or physically? I bless him with brown hair and blue eyes and a long, healthy, happy life. 

I also don't really understand anybody that has a close relationship with their family. I have friends that rush off to call their mums and pops 3 times a day and I find myself baffled by this. The only time I ever talk to my parents is if something is wrong or I need money or my brother is off his rocker again. I see them twice a year, and while I get occasional pangs of longing to sit around and chain smoke and curse up a blue streak over the latest episode of "American Idol", it passes pretty quickly. Don't get me wrong, my family is close in a way, but I more or less think of them as really good friends I'm not that close to anymore that enjoy supporting me financially sometimes. We definitely have the best of times when we're together.

I want to have my own family someday, and all these things worry me. I don't want to have an estranged daughter, or never hear from my children, and have them walking about saying "my mom is seriously fucked up" to their friends five times a day. I guess the only way to prevent this is to just NOT REPRODUCE. 

XO